08 Apr The Importance of Consent
Consent is sexy. Consent is also necessary. Extremely necessary.
We are all sovereign individual beings. I am a sovereign individual being. Therefore you absolutely must not treat an erotic practitioner with a level of entitlement over their body. Just because you paid money for a session with this person does not mean that they owe you their body.
Women’s sexual energy fluctuates. A lot. Women’s sexual energy has phases of waxing and waning.
One week a woman might want to be touched, the next week she might not.
One week a woman might be losing her mind in an otherworldly level of ecstasy just from having her boobs ravished, the next week she might want to kill you for licking her nipples.
One week a woman might be feeling incredibly turned on, heightened and super generous, the next week she can’t freaking deal with anything and needs to hide in a cave.
There are times during my sessions that I feel Really Turned On and I feel like I’m losing it and want to hump a mountain afterwards. And other times when I feel like a fucking nun. That’s because I’m a woman.
So what that means is, yeah – I might have been dying in a peak state of super charged pleasure when we had a session a few months ago when you were licking my nipples… But I don’t feel that way today and I don’t want you to be sucking on my nipples. And I don’t want to have to say anything to distract from the moment!
Here’s where it gets complicated… NonVerbal Communication. You would think that men would learn about women’s nonverbal communication. When a woman pulls her body away over and over again, you would think that means to back off – you’re irritating her. But No, I have learned that a lot of men really struggle with actually grasping women’s nonverbal / physical communication.
So… what’s the answer? GET CONSENT.
Do you want to suck on her nipples? Ask for it. Get consent. If she says yes, enjoy. If you ask and she says her nipples are super sensitive this week and she doesn’t want her nipples sucked, then please back off and respect her.
Do you want to touch her body? Do you want to touch her anywhere else…? Ask. Get consent.
If you have not received consent, you are not allowed to touch, kiss, suck or grope. It is not welcome.
So… what if you are a regular client and the last session you had a totally hot experience and she let you suck on her boobs? You Absolutely Need To Ask Each Session. This cannot be emphasized enough. Each moment is a new moment.
Just because a woman was feeling super turned on and generous a month ago does not mean she’s feeling it today, and no woman feels sexy when they feel like they have to give you what you want. When a woman is feeling cajoled or cornered into giving into what you want, it just turns the sexy vibe dial down.
So ask for consent. And respect a Yes or a No. It’s that simple.